How a painful wake-up call unlocked my greatest journey
Chapter 5: Quitting my job and apartment was scary, but it led to the trip of a lifetime.
Welcome to Chapter 5 of Love at First Flight, my round-the-world travel memoir.
In this chapter, I reveal how an unexpected back injury set me on the path to a new adventurous life.
A sudden collapse
One Friday evening, after another exhausting week at work, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when a sharp, stabbing pain shot through my lower back. I collapsed.
I tried to stand but couldn't—my back had completely locked up. Panic set in as I realised I was alone—my flatmate was away.
Somehow, I managed to crawl down the stairs to my room, my heart racing. Each movement sent another jolt through my back. I hauled myself onto my bed, unsure what to do next.
Through my bedroom window, I could see flags flapping in the breeze—remnants of London’s celebrations after hosting the 2012 Olympics. The city was buzzing with pride, but there I was, stuck in the fetal position, the furthest thing from jubilant.
When the pain became unbearable, I called a taxi to take me to the hospital.
The longest evening
By the time I arrived, the stabs of pain were relentless. The accident and emergency waiting room was full of chatter and activity. Dozens of sick and injured people waited to be seen, while doctors and nurses hurried past, absorbed in their tasks.
Awkwardly, I stretched myself across two chairs, unable to sit properly, as what felt like electric shocks tore through my back. I bit my lip to keep from crying out.
Eventually, the agony was too much. I tried to catch someone’s attention, but no one seemed to notice, except for a chef nearby who had burned his hand. Seeing me shivering, he gently laid his coat over me. A small gesture, but in that moment, I was incredibly grateful.
Hours passed before a nurse called me. By then, my back had completely seized up. I begged for a wheelchair, but she refused.
So, in one of the most humiliating moments of my life, I dragged myself across the dirty hospital floor—on my stomach, like a soldier crawling under fire—while the nurse walked ahead, indifferent to my struggle.
When I finally reached the ward, the doctor gave me painkillers, but they barely dulled the pain. She explained that my lower back muscles were in spasm, and stress could be the culprit. I left the hospital, bent over like an old woman, wincing with every step.
Four days passed before I could stand upright again.
The root of my pain
As I struggled into the office a few days later, I realised my body had been trying to tell me something, like: ‘You’re not listening to me? Fine, let's get dramatic.’
Doctors had brushed off my concerns about sleepless nights and daily anxiety, so I looked elsewhere for answers. I’d started learning about chakras, the body’s seven ‘energy points’ (even if I was a bit skeptical). Sam, our teacher, explained how the root chakra, at the base of the spine, governs feelings of safety and stability. When blocked, it can manifest as anxiety or… lower back pain.
Suddenly, things started to make sense.
My body was screaming at me to face the truth: my so-called security was built on fear. On the surface, my job was glamorous and full of perks—but I was clinging to it like it was the only thing keeping me from falling apart. Because deep down, I was unhappy.
I wish I could say this realisation led to an instant breakthrough, but it didn’t. I threw myself back into work as usual, and my depression only deepened.
My parents saw my misery and suggested I see a life coach.
A coffee shop epiphany
Walking into a coffee shop to meet David, the life coach, I felt utterly defeated. I had tried everything—new jobs, yoga, new routines—yet nothing had lifted the fog.
I explained how trapped I felt: the daily worries, work dramas, and my long-held desire to travel the world, which felt unrealistic.
After listening patiently, David said:
"It seems to me you have two options. You can either focus on thriving in your job, or leave and go travelling. Which one is more important to you?"
His words were simple, but they parted the clouds in my mind, letting a chink of sunlight through for the first time in months.
For so long, I had been paralysed by the weight of my choices, tangled in a web of fears and doubts. But really, it boiled down to two paths: stay or go.
As I stared at my latte, I reflected on everything that had brought me to this point: my wonky wheel of life, the girls’ trip to Italy, my dating attempts in London, and the festival of lights in Thailand. I thought about the Traveller card I’d pulled during the lunar eclipse at the Thai yoga resort, the pep talk about taking the leap, and the months spent managing my inner critic. London had its moments, but the times I felt most alive, most present, were when I was out exploring the world.
The sensible part of me wanted to stay, succeed in my job and save up for a house. But the wild side of me? She knew she wanted to travel. I had silenced her for years, despite all the joy I'd felt during my recent solo adventures.
Could the thing I feared most—letting go—actually be the solution? As the life coach spoke, somewhere in my mind a door opened that I hadn’t even realised was there. Maybe my wild side was right. Leaving was the only way to truly be happy.
We agreed: travelling the world was the answer. Part of me found this hilarious; the other half was terrified.
David helped me map out the next steps and timeline to make this happen: quit my flat, leave my job, and book the round-the-world trip I’d dreamt of for years. First up: quitting my apartment.
My inner critic chimed in, of course: “You must be mad! This is totally reckless!” But instead of spiralling into panic, as I would have done before, I smiled. Maybe this was crazy—in a good way. After all, the best adventures usually start with a little bit of craziness.
Farewell to my safe haven
Emailing my landlady to hand in my notice felt surreal. As I typed the words, I shifted uncomfortably in my chair, the dull pain in my lower back a constant reminder that everything was changing.
I loved my flat and living with my friend. The cozy dinners, our shared jokes and the familiar creaks — this place had become my haven. Saying goodbye to this stability was its own kind of ache.
But beneath the fear, a fresh excitement bubbled up that I couldn’t ignore. For the first time in ages, I wasn’t hanging on by a thread—I was stepping into a new adventure.
I hit ‘send’ on my three months’ notice, feeling like I was watching someone else in a movie scene. But I’d done it. The countdown had begun.
Stepping away from the safety net
A few weeks later, I stood outside my boss’s office, holding my resignation letter in trembling hands. My heart pounded as I stepped through the door.
Handing the letter to my boss, I heard myself say the words, “I’m resigning.” Then something incredible happened. A wave of relief swept over me—like a heavy weight I hadn’t even realized I was carrying had finally lifted. For the first time in months, I smiled—really smiled.
I walked out of her office, half expecting dramatic background music to play as the soundtrack to my new main character energy.
In that moment, I felt like the genuinely happy person my boss had always wanted me to be. But I couldn’t be that person while clinging to this job. Only by letting go of my steady salary could I start to feel joy again.
At lunch, I confided in a colleague about my plans. She smiled knowingly:
“I went travelling in my thirties too. It’s the best thing I ever did. You won’t regret it.”
Hearing her speak with such certainty was the final vote of confidence I needed. I could definitely do this.
Picturing my new life
Having cleared the space in my life, now I needed to understand what my new one would look like.
I’d read about women who’d created vision boards to focus on their desires for the upcoming year, and decided to make my own. Instead of battling glue sticks and magazine clippings, I went digital — hello, Pinterest, my old friend.
Armed with a cup of tea, I pinned images of far-off mountains, beaches and sunsets. My vision board quickly became a visual shout-out to Eat, Pray, Love. Motivational quotes dotted the board, nudging me to be brave.
Why hadn’t I done this sooner? I could’ve spared myself all those nights spent staring at the ceiling, trying to figure my life out.
Despite my cynicism, a flicker of hope took root. These weren’t only pictures—they were promises. Promises of freedom and adventure. The life I’d been too scared to imagine was now coming together before my eyes.
A leap towards a new life
I didn’t have all the answers yet.
My back had given me the warning I needed, and while the pain was gone, I knew my root chakra hadn’t magically healed. My fears hadn’t vanished, and I certainly wasn’t fully prepared for what lay ahead.
But for the first time in what felt like forever, I was OK with not knowing. I had taken the first step, and sometimes, that’s all it takes to change everything.
For so long, I’d been in survival mode, clutching what I thought was safety. As I slowly let go of the branch I’d been gripping, finger by finger, I realized I wasn’t falling—I was learning how to fly. Even my inner critic seemed to go quiet, curious to see what would happen next.
So there I was, finally planning my dream trip—because why settle for stability when you can embark on an epic adventure, right?
This was the start of a whole new chapter, full of unknowns and possibilities. I was ready.
And the adventure? That was only just beginning.
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In the next chapter, I start the exciting part: designing my round-the-world adventure! Read it here.
Thinking of taking a career break to travel the world? I'd love to help guide you through the leap. If you're interested or want to chat about your plans, drop me a message.