25 Comments
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Benthall Slow Travel's avatar

Claire — I adored this piece. You captured that exact alchemy of awkwardness and freedom that solo travel brings — the moment when you realize the empty seat beside you isn’t a symbol of lack, but of possibility.

I laughed at the image of you reading the same page twenty times (been there) and felt that quiet triumph in the barefoot walk home. Sometimes the most tender kind of courage is just showing up for ourselves — one flight, one meal, one wobbly zip-line at a time.

Here’s to losing more shoes and finding more of ourselves out there.

💛 Kelly

Calley Overton's avatar

Oh, I loved this! There's something so beautiful about being vulnerable enough to embrace the cringe of a dating seminar and that being the catalyst to take the leap to start solo traveling and falling in love with it. it's so brave to go alone and you did it and are doing it! also, the little moments and interactions you get while solo traveling are so fun. going with friends (or with a partner I guess, no experience there) is also fun, but you don't meet as many people and just... stick in your bubble. and the part about reading the same page of a book twenty times and trying to seem like you were having a great time is so real. sometimes you just gotta pretend for a bit before it sticks lol.

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

Thank you! 🙏🫶 And you're right - travelling with someone else just isn't the same! (still fun, of course)

Andrew Paget's avatar

Great piece, thanks Claire! It’s certainly a brave move to quit the rat race for a time and take a trip for yourself. Seeing different cultures and having different experiences really adds necessary perspective.

Life is for living (and not for chasing arbitrary milestones)!

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

Absolutely! Thanks Andrew, appreciate your comment.

Margaret's avatar

I totally agree. On my last family holiday, one of my sisters asked if I actually enjoy travelling on my own. I couldn’t say yes fast enough. No shade on my family, cos I do love them, but I also love waking up and just doing what I feel like, so I don’t miss out on the things I really want to see and do. And honestly, you meet so many more people when you travel solo. And as for the embarrassing/awkward parts - they make for great travel stories.

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

Yes! I'm glad you understand! Thanks so much for your comment, Margaret.

Richard Philion's avatar

I can totally relate to this. My first time traveling solo was awkward but I quickly gained confidence and mastered the art of not giving a f$&! about what other people think.

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

Yes! Love this.

Floating Files's avatar

thank you so much for sharing this

key take away

stop caring what people think of you and do what you have always dreamed of doing

even if it feels weird and people judge you for it - at least you can say you tried!

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

Absolutely right! No regrets at all.

Alvin Toro's avatar

I just commented on some else’s note about the amount of people I’ve met over the years who would never entertain the idea of sitting alone at a local bar or restaurant, let alone jump on a plane to the other side of the world on their own. We’re a real special breed us solo travelers!

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

Yes! I think about this too sometimes.

MargaretGypsy's avatar

I love your stories, Claire. They are both humorous and heart touching. I also enjoy your photos, they are so natural.

I have had more relationships than lost socks, but even when I was in a relationship, many times I chose to travel sola. In over thirty years of doing that, I have seen a major change in how people respond to my presence. The world is an odd place and we have no need to adjust to it!

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

Thank you, Margaret, I appreciate your comments! What difference have you seen - do you find there is more acceptance of solo travellers now?

MargaretGypsy's avatar

Definitely more acceptance. People, even other women, used to look at me like I had some defect. It also invited unwanted conversations and small talk from men, even when I would be quite blatant about not wanting to chat. Now, it is the norm and nobody even blinks twice at a woman traveling alone.

Dave Paquiot's avatar

What I love most here is the shift from chasing the “acceptable adulthood” checklist to honoring that younger version of yourself who stared at the world map and wanted more. The way you turned awkward solo moments into a kind of courage practice feels incredibly real.

There’s something powerful about realizing the thing we’re most afraid of—being alone, being seen as “behind”—is the doorway to the life that actually fits. Losing your shoes on the beach might be the most honest metaphor for that freedom I’ve seen in a while.

Beautiful piece.

Claire Ingham/Claire in Crete's avatar

I remember getting off a plane at 5am in the morning in Lima, thinking "I'm on my own - In Peru! What the hell am I doing here!?" A few days later, on my first trip into the Sacred Valley, I looked around at the towering mountains and thought THIS is what I came for. I might never have done it if, at the age of 20 I hadn't won an academic scholarship to study for a year in California. Leaving my little Scottish university with just a suitcase for a year abroad felt like a massive step - but it did teach me that I could go places on my own, and everything would be just fine... These days, I divide my time between Crete and the UK. I'm married, but I often spend time on my own in Crete, working. I've had moments when people have assumed I must want company - but I'm quite happy to say, that I have no problem being on my own, if that's what the moment calls for. And now I write about living in Crete too claireleesingham.substack.com

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

I've had that feeling too, Claire!

Jose Melendez (Dan Kobayashi)'s avatar

I’ve been married 13 years and I still love traveling alone and do it regularly. Sure, I’d rather travel with my wife, but then the kids have to come too, and they don’t like walking 15 miles a day.

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

Apparently many solo travellers these days have partners/kids back home!

Vy's avatar

Love this piece, Claire. The embarrassing stories are what make us who we are; and yes, the most embarrassing/ awkward thing to do is not do what you actually want to do adn let others hold you back.

ps. I've read the same page of a book over and over again in soooo many solo settings because I get so caught up in being alone and what others around me are doing, etc. That part made me smile:)

Claire Drinkwater's avatar

Thank you so much, Vy! And yes haha I'm glad you understand the book thing!